Veteran of the Psychic Wars

So, I've come to realize I have a shit-load of fic. I decided to actually update and correct my Master List o' Fic for the new comm, got the CM stuff, got the Smv x-over pR0n, got all but the 1 x-over from BtVS, and it's like 6 pages long!!! I haven't even started the SPN or the DA! *head desk* Where does it all come from!!!!!!!


Went to my p-doc Friday and decided the happy meds weren't at the new higher dosage, which means that a) I may not have BP afterall- gee treat me for it for 5+ years THEN notice the BP drugs aren't working. *head desk* At least I can't blame more than the past couple months on this doc, and HE actually noticed, lol. No, he thinks I may have a combination of ADHD and Asperger, since the symptoms fit if they're taken together. What I don't get is how I can do the same exact test from two different sources and one calculates my as astronomically high on the probable Asperger scale and the other hade me almost as low as you can get... I'm thinkin' maybe I misread one of them. Anyway, this is gonna be fun since it's virtually impossible to dx AS in adults and the only ppl who know/remember when I was younger are in the States and speak another language. I keep tellin' the doc he doesn't know my family and how we can make things happen if it's important enough. *sigh* Right now we're still in the testing and proding with sticks portion of the dx. Well that and he's lowering my meds from 800 back down to 400, and I gotta say I'm noticing the good effects even now at the 600. Something else he said would happen if he was right about the BP being mis-dx, something about the meds I'm on effecting the epinephrine and dopamine levels/conductivity. It's confusing, but that's why god made me a lab rat, umm I mean that's why there's testing and such!

Oh, on a fandomy note, the muses are being quite odd and behaving, I'm getting some good stuff down for my dc_fireplace fic, and my brain is really wanting to work on Arcana. *shockgasphorror* I'm actually thinking I might set a proper 'goal' for having it finished by, I'm thinking my b-day, yeah it's MONTHS away but that'll allow for the time the docs bugger me up tweaking my meds and poking me with spoons and other kitchen equipment.
I also got the final kink (not the good kind) worked out on my fanmixes for dc_fireplace, now I just gotta do the graphics... not a problem except I need to find some REALLLLLLLLLy good head on shots of the 'pala. This is not as easy as one would think. Any f-listies with bright ideas are welcome to point me in the right direction if they are so inclined.


I FINALLY got a copy of the BBC's HHGttG that has the voice over!!!!!!!! (This prolly only make sense to other ppl with parrots) *does happy dance*

So now that I've fangrrled all over the place, how 'bout some boring stuff! (with some fandoming thrown in 'cause I really am that pathetic, lol)

On the loony tunes front, p-doc upped me to 600 mg last week and... well, manic much? Last week it was kinda useful, (before he upped the dosage) I was doing all sorts of stuff too fast to even notice, but the weird part was that I was actually FINISHING whatever I was working on before getting distracted by the new shiny. Now I'm still all over the place but it's more "normal", can't follow one train of thought before it crashes head long into another. Mys- the mental trainwreck, lol. On the upside the shakes are gone and my muses are still around just having trouble focusing them *grrr*
And Pup's not helping that much, she's trying to, but... like t'other day we're both in the kitchen cooking and she starts in on whether or not it was possible that I was 'faking' (as in thinking I was therefore I was) having this manic bout I'm having. What the FUCK kind of question is that? I tried to stay calm and tell her how I could tell, that it was a difference in how your brain felt and if you had to you could stop it if it was one of those 'self-induced' things. But it still hurt that she didn't believe me, or at least acted like she didn't believe me. *pouts*
And then there was this other thing, a couple weeks ago, she was trying to understand how I was feeling (esp since the doc usually talks to her on the phone when he's checking up on me- that whole language barrier thing), but everytime I got something across so she understood she'd be all "Well, I'm not telling the doctor that! That's a sure way to get you locked up!", so WTF I'm supposed to only tell half of how I'm feeling, or what my triggers are? Hello, doesn't make a lick of sense!!! *is confuzzled* Makes me want to just fuck it all and not do anything for it. *grrr*

I'm going through SPN withdrawal... but that's neither here, nor there, just thought I'd mention it, lol.

Well, it's pretty obvious I survived the holidays (thank gods), I got to cook again this year, though no one really eats my food- something about it being weird American food, lol. Anyway, the reason I wound up cooking was because of HRH's boytoy, he's awesome (no you can't have him, both me and the missus have called dibs, followed by my mom, so yeah there's a line- take a number). He heard that last year I did a full on American Christmas dinner and announced to HRH that they were spending Christmas with us, lol. This had apparently been a bone of contention until then, lol. Anyway, we comprimized and did the American dinner the day before (which was actually two days before, since they insist on celebrating Christmas on the 24th instead of the 25th- I think they do it just to confuse everyone else, lol) and the traditional dinner the day of. *shakes head*

Is it justifiable homicide to kill the HS? She's being uber-bitch! I really hate children... really, really hate them. Haha, even my p-doc realized this last time I saw him... it's kinda freaky, his only concern was whether it was like babies or older school aged children... he just kinda smiled and said ok, and we went on, lol. Have I mentioned my p-doc is pretty damn cool, lol.

Oh, yeah, I have a question for you fandom type ppl- I'm working on a fanmix, well, two actually, but I'm never sure what the 'acceptable' number of tracks to have is, so any words of wisdom?
*waits and listens to the crickets*